"Hi, I will be your child's only teacher this year."
"Hi, I will be your child's primary teacher this year."
"Hi, I will be your child's end-all be-all of informative data this year."
"Hi, I will be your child's go-to individual for latent life lessons and general upkeep."
"Hi, I will be your child's bane of existence."
"Hi, I will be your child's endless purveyor of homework that you will never understand."
"Hi, I will be your child's next authority figure to ignore in a whole line of incompetent failures."
"Hi, I will be your child's excuse for not doing well."
Is it too soon to become jaded? I graduated in 2008. By 2009, I was still flipping burgers and making bulk macaroni salad orders. But this isn't going to be about how I made more money there than if I were subbing. No, this won't be about money. This is about the fact that I made more money dealing with people who cared far more about whether there was sauce in the bag than if their child could perform basic mathematical equations.
This is not to say that there aren't some killer parents out there. The balanced ones who care about their child's academic and personal well-being without being overbearing or jumping to conclusions about whether my credentials are credentially enough for them. Contrary to popular or unpopular opinion, I have been substituting and tutoring and I have seen quite the gamut during the past 4 years.
I understand, almost ridiculously so, that it is frustrating when a child does not "get it." Believe me, this is the bread and butter of my very job. I realize that if a child comes home around 3. . .and a parent comes home. . .say, around 5. And dinner is at 6. And Biggest Loser is on at 8. There is precious little time to sit down with your child and get to the business. I fully comprehend this predicament. It is one of those great first-world problems. Too much to do and eat and see and experience that it leaves so little time for sundries like homework and spending time getting to know how education has changed since you were a wee one.
Do I sound sarcastic? I have to admit that I am wavering. I 100% mean what I've said but I also have a slight disdain for people who continually (repeat: continually) do their child's homework for them because they don't have time to re-teach it because "that's the teacher's job.
"Hi, I will NOT be your child's only teacher this year."
School is supplementary to a child's personal development and academic growth. You have had your child for 5-6 years before I even see them. That's a master's degree's worth of time. You might think not because we're talking babies and toddlers here. But children learn at a much more accelerated rate than adults. And these incredibly formative years are yours to take advantage of. Obviously, life has rough patches. And none of us are perfect. Often, we find ourselves at the end of our rope. So, it happens. We rush a child along, we think FOR them. It's excusable, but not on a chronic base.
"Hi, I will NOT be your child's primary teacher this year."
You are your child's primary caregiver and, therefore, teacher. I am paid to provide a supplemental curriculum that is governed by state and nation. I am paid to work WITH you in conjunction with the things that you are doing in YOUR home. I'm not instructing every parent to devote an entire room of their house to being a classroom with a desk, a chalkboard and lesson plans. But teaching opportunities will arise. Don't miss them and don't leave them entirely up to me.
"Hi, I will NOT be your child's end-all be-all of informative data this year."
Especially with the advent of the internet, there is absolutely no excuse to miss out on becoming more informed and to exemplify to your own child that you are a lifelong learner. Even if you are the most destitute parent on the earth, if you live in a neighborhood or community with a library or have friends who have access to the internet, you should not be hiding in the dark ages.
"Hi, I will NOT be your child's endless purveyor of homework that you will never understand."
No parent should ever say, "I don't know." It should be, "I don't know. . .but let's find out." Ok, so you're busy. "I don't know. . .so try it on your own and when I am finished here, let's find out." For goodness' sake, it's one of my favorite lines in the classroom and I'm classically trained to know things! Eight times out of 10, a child will figure it out on their own. I can not count the actual number of times a child has asked for help on an assignment because they either did not read the directions or they simply did not even give themselves the opportunity to sit for 10 seconds and try it for themselves.
Parents Expecting me to be the Babysitter
Between the hours of 9 and 3:30 (and often before and after), I am expected to carry out lesson plans that adhere to standards and objectives demanded by the state and the district. I am not a childcare service.
Unfortunately, I have worked in places where children are dropped off for "tutoring" and have demonstrated that it is completely unnecessary. The parents just need a free place for their children to stay. I do not mind having these kids around. I love being with them and getting to know them. But, it seems unfair to boor these children to death with procedures and concepts that they already grasp while making those who need the tutoring feel intimidated by the presence of these more proficient students. Sure, I've teamed them up as high and low student groups because, after all, the best way to learn is by teaching. But that's merely a happy coincidence and my excellent training showing its face. The parents had nothing to do with it, intentionally. I know childcare is expensive and a babysitter can not always be found. But come on, parents, think!
"Hi, I will NOT be your child's go-to individual for latent life lessons and general upkeep."
School is a great and terrible place to learn some very important life lessons. And while I'm always there to hold a hand, try to say the right thing or give out bandaids, I am not Mom or Dad. I am not the hero. And speaking of heroes:
"Hi, I will be your child's bane of existence."
I just may be. And while I know most parents want to give their children the benefit of the doubt and believe them when they say their teacher is the worst monster imaginable. . .cut me some slack. I am not here to make life easy for your child. I am here to make life accessible to your child; through application of knowledge they gain while in my classroom. I am helping them set the stage for the rest of their life. Helping them. Not doing it for them. Not doing it on my own, either. I need your help. If that means you also need to be the bad guy and insist on doing work that is "too hard," so be it.
"Hi, I will NOT be your child's next authority figure to ignore in a whole line of incompetent failures."
There are also parents, on the other hand, who give no benefit of the doubt to their children. Some kids have fair gripes with teachers. Remember, we're not perfect, either. But I will not stand by when a child is actively abusive or distracting. Unless I am informed about a child's tendencies or given pieces of pertinent background information, I will employ the management techniques that would normally work for a child who is acting out.
If there is an at-home situation or an extreme lifestyle change that a child is enveloped in, the teacher should know so that she can make both allowances and changes to her behavior plans that are specific for that child. Excuses for behavior are one thing, but reasons are another. Consider the teacher/parent relationship much like that of a doctor/patient. It will be confidential and there's no reason to feel embarrassed or judged. Sometimes, things happen in families that directly affect a child's behavior and ability to excel. I absolutely NEED to know at least the general conflict, if not all the details.
"Hi, I will NOT be your child's excuse for not doing well."
This is why we have parent/teacher conferences. It is a place to air out concerns or grievances but it's also a great time to bring up positive points and make sure that everyone is on the same page. Most of the time, from having been involved in several of these conferences, it is the latter that occurs with the exception of small, albeit important, concerns. Someone's not turning in homework when the parent is saying that they've seen the child's completed work. Someone's getting high grades on class and home work but low grades on tests. These are the kinds of problems that come up and can usually be resolved between parent, child and teacher. It's a trifecta. Neither of us does it alone. We are the holy trinity of the academic child's existence.
It seems sad that I have so much to complain about when I don't even have my own classroom yet. Oh, the humanity when I do. But I will say one absolutely wonderfully positive thing about teaching:
The overwhelming and spectacularly satisfying duties I have had bestowed upon myself by becoming a teacher and lifelong learner are rewarding because I get to go to school for the rest of my life. And I can reinvent the wheel every year if I want or need to. I get to share a passion for knowledge that can not be feigned. I get to be part of a process that will change childrens' lives. And I get to do what I love. And get paid for it. Not much, but then sometimes blessings are worth more.
0 comments:
Post a Comment